sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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