Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
