I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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