ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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