gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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