Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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