We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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