Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
