Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize
