Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize