How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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