Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
