college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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