Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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