so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
