is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
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