ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
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