The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize