When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize