she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
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When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
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Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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