You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
