But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
