her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're making bets on your personal life
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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