to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize