How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
