So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
