just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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