i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
