I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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