margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
