this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
