Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I want to be your penis for a week.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
