Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize