OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
