I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
