When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
