OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
