Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I would fuck him just for his dog
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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