it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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