I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
is wine microwaveable?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
not ubering you a puppy
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
