is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
