I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize