well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize