...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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