Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize