The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
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