I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
