had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
