i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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