somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
